Thanks to the wonderful suggestion from a friend, I'm going to make this next post in conjunction with the last one. It's a two part series of my thrilling twenty-something life and dating. HURRAY! You know you're jumping up and down at the thought of it, or never submitting yourself to this blog again.

Whatever, it's your loss. You'll really miss out when I do my next blog post about superhuman tricks all done by me! Now do I have your unwanted attention?!?

Even though its's a two part series, this post will be the opposite take on the matter. Twenty-three things that I wish Prince Charming would do in the presence of moi. Food makes many appearances on the list, so now you know what's really important to me.

Gentlemanly Behavior Consists Of:

Rubbing my feet continuously from dawn until dusk
Filling my cocktail up when it's only half empty. No Exceptions.
Wear a fanny pack and make it look cool! I still don't know why this is important, probably because it seems impossible to do. Prove me wrong!
Has a large vocabulary and uses words like fiddle sticks, malarky, lickety-split, fuddy duddy, and dollop.
Always follows Rule #76. No excuses, play like a champion.
Dance like Tom Cruise in Risky Business
Never wear socks and sandals together
Encouraging my bad behavior & shenanigans. You should not be the voice of reason. I'll consult my cat for that...
Turning into a gay best friend when I go shopping and then reverting back to his manly straight self afterwards
Is the head honcho of the Girl Scouts. Thin Mints will be served at every meal.
Gets my attention with a flare gun or with airplanes that perform skywriting
Writes me letters using owls or carrier pigeons
Transports us on dates in a hang glider or hot air balloon
Ensures all my meals are cooked in dark chocolate or wine
Wine about everything & Wine with everything. Better yet, just own your own vineyard.
Calls upon me to have afternoon tea in the parlor, Oscar Wilde style
Watches the television channel TCM on a regular basis
Chuck Palaniuk and Nelson DeMille write books after you
Using the Helen Keller card in Apples to Apples every chance you get
Knows all of the movie quotes that are worthy of regurgitating
Dancing face-to-face: must know how to foxtrot, waltz, and swing dance
Guacamole and cheese are food groups to you
Throw parties that are unforgettable. Refer to socialite Holly Golightly for any tips.

P.S. I just figured out how to make it available for all you viewers in the world to follow my blog. So now that's a thing. Start Following ME! If not, I say this to you.

"Listen up you little spazoids. I know where you live and I've seen where you sleep. I swear to everything holy that your mothers will cry when they seen what I've done to you."
- Michelle from Tommy Boy

P.P.S. The icon is hiding underneath the search bar on the right. If you move your mouse in that general direction it should hopefully pop up. I'm new to this whole thing, so when I figure out a better way to make this work I'll let you know!